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Death is my saviourDeath is my life, Death is my saviour,
Everyone thinks I'm weird due to my behaviour,
I always hide away from the world, never really caring,
When its non-uni at school I find everyone's staring,
That girl is weird, ugly, a freak,
I've found the world very grey and bleak.
I'm not able to live a simple life without there being any faults,
Being involved in too many assaults,
I just block out the empty world I live in,
People say that believing in satan is a sin,
I just give them a shrug and a smile saying that's me,
But that's all a lie, fake can't you see?
At home I'm just the same,
This is really serious not a game,
I'm not able to tell the truth only lies,
It is not fair on others it brings tears to my eyes,
I cannot laugh, I cannot smile,
Well I can but it will only last a little while.
I have to wear a mask to hide all emotions,
It is just the same with my motions,
I lie in my room wishing to die,
Not able to find an exit no matter how hard I try,
It's not fair I can't be normal,
Homelessness is a cruel fate,
Not able to show you face till late,
Begging on the streets because it matters,
Glancing hopefully at the expressionless and pocket-patters.
The newspapers write terrible lies,
We're not evil, it brings tears to my eyes,
I don't go around buying fags and drugs with my dosh,
The only people fortunate to buy such stuff is the rich and posh.
I look at the people who spend money as they please,
Always wearing the most expensive stuff just to tease,
I stare at the more lucky soul with their perfect hair,
How come they're so fortunate? It's just not fair.
I'm sorry mum and sorry dad,
I gave up the best life I ever had,
I should have never carried that knife with me,
But I just wanted protection can't you see?
The goverment promised to help us but they never did,
When ever the police came I ran and hid,
How I managed to get in this state I don't know,
But one thing is for sure that the world is your foe.
I don't understand what is wrong wi
To depression, for creating days without endWake up to the realization that you've been awake
for seconds, minutes, hours.
You've been awake in this warm, dark room
and you don't know how long it's been
but now you're conscious
and it starts again--
the pain, strong and steady, in your chest.
You gain consciousness in this too warm morning
and your thoughts whir in endless loops
because it's either that or face the weight in your chest.
Light breaks though the window, soft and unwelcome
but you take it as a reluctant gift--
a new distraction from the feelings awake in your chest.
Awake, but not conscious.
So you think yourself in circles a little while longer
waiting for those quiet pains
(the constant reminder)
to gain consciousness.
IowaIf you visit Iowa,
you'll call her fields empty,
but she wasn't born that way.
A part of her was carved out
when she was ripped between Virginia
and the purple mountains of New Mexico.
Her gold hair, she tore it out when she realized
it didn't make her a princess.
She laid her locks strung along every road
leading somewhere else.
White hairs on her cheeks
are scars from winter.
Her hair darkens with the dampness
of summer rains.
The storms are never silent,
but neither is life when there's a tear
in your childhood where
a parent ought to be.
I've been flooded by Iowa's sorrow.
The only way I can distract her from her own voided landscape
is if I hate myself harder than she cries.
She just wants to fly
and I want to bus or train,
not because I fear death, but because
I want to take living slow.
It's the only way I ever feel.
From the air it's hard to watch Earth's hips move.
But Earth can't compare to the country.
That's my girl.
Full grown even when harvesting season's j
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More